It is that time of year again . . . my annual musings on the year that was. I sit down to write this about a week before my birthday and I really enjoy taking a trip down memory lane and forcing reflection on the good and bad parts of the last year.
RULES:
- Each blurb is limited to at most a general topic and no more than three sentences or three bullet points to support my thought.
- Some thoughts will be repeated from year to year – just because I continue to believe in them that much.
- Pics will be added where appropriate.
Let’s go . . .
At this time I both have the most and least hair I have ever had in my life.
Be teachable – the world is BIGGER than your view of it. It is also bigger than my view of it. Less confidence in your opinions – more curiosity in other’s thoughts.
I asked Caroline and Anthony what he wanted to try and cook with me and if it turned out good enough we could cook that for Thanksgiving for everyone else. Caroline – instantly – pumpkin pie. Anthony – waits a few minutes – comes back very proud and assured of himself and says, ‘T-BONE.” Love that kid.
I think as humans we have always sought to find our clan – our ideological match. For many years this was based in family, church, and community. Now, it is my belief too many people have found their clan – their ideological match – most notably in their political affiliation and cable news station, and that is not good for any of us in my opinion.
The fear of failing at something has stopped many people from sharing their wildest ambitions with two very important sets of people. First – THEMSELVES. Second, the people they love the most. As a result – more status quo in people’s lives.
Take one of your kids to the hospital and you instantly realize how stupid and inconsequential everything that has been pissing you off really is.
Favorite dad joke of the year: What did the fish say when it swam into a wall. . . .. DAM. 2nd place – What is the difference between deer nuts and beer nuts? Beer nuts cost about a buck fifty and deer nuts are usually under a buck.
One of my best friends who had much older kids once told me when I was tired and complaining while raising littles: LITTLE KIDS, LITTLE PROBLEMS. BIG KIDS, BIG PROBLEMS. I despised this comment then, but in hindsight he could not have been more correct.
Parenting is just a freaking educated guess. Sometimes I have no idea if I have too many demands or not enough. All I know is that my goal is to raise them well enough to leave and be on their own and choose to come back to hang out every once and a while.
My God, the Bears are hard to continue to root for. Almost every Sunday, Jacquie looks over slightly concerned and says, “I am not sure why you do this to yourself week after week.”
Jackson wants to be a teacher right now . . . and that makes me incredibly happy. I do not understand the people that stay in jobs and then discourage their children from following that same path.
Relaxing – drinking, hanging out with friends, staying up late, eating garbage food is really fun – but will not RECHARGE you. Eating right, exercising, sleeping, drinking water, and being around those you love will refill your battery. Relaxing and Recharging are two very different things.
People wear busyness as a badge of honor. I heard something this year that stopped me in my tracks – busyness is just laziness of mind and failure to prioritize. Let that wash over you and re-evaluate your schedule.
Favorite places on Earth to visit: Montego Bay, Las Vegas, Sanibel/Captiva, San Diego
Nothing makes me more STUPIDLY mad than when I am swiping to delete an email and the phone refreshes and I have deleted an email that I never saw, so then I have to go into deleted emails to make sure it was not important.
I love audiobooks but I retain less than when I read . . . so I started to listen to two in a pair. I finish one, start the other, finish and then go back to the first. Retention for me is similar to reading in this fashion.
Man, I love fantasy football. I am not much better at it in Year 20 than I was in Year 1. Maybe the only thing I have done and not improved at that I grow in affection for . . .
Top Five Books Read over the past year – in order: The Dichotomy of Leadership, The Attributes, Stories that Stick, Tools of Titans, the Road Less Stupid
I bought my first crypto this year . . . and it was named after a frickin dog
I can speak on stage in front of a 1,000 adults and not have an ounce of anxiety . . . but if I read to Kindergarteners I need a towel to wipe the sweat off of my brow.
I take strange pride in the fact that my iPhone is 3+ years old.
We often use not having enough time as an excuse, but I think what the initial quarantine phase demonstrated is that for most of us we do not do things we do not like doing – it has nothing to do with time. If we want to do something, we find a way. If not, we find an excuse.
Caroline did five pull-ups this year so I challenged her (with a monetary prize) to do 5 one-handed pull-ups by the end of summer. She called me in about four later and, you guessed it, I owed her money.
People tend to use data to support their prior opinions, but do not trust data enough to allow it to force them into new ways of thinking.
Jameson can grab the rim now — that made me feel like he had grown up and I was getting old more than any birthday could.
Increasing self-awareness is the quickest path forward to becoming better at EVERYTHING.
Alright, I admit it. I really like Lizzo’s Good as Hell.
Really, really good parents can have fundamental differences of opinion, philosophy, and behavior and still both be really, really good parents.
We all have choices to make – every single day and in every single situation. We often blame others, but it is really about us not having more agency in our own lives – the truth is that we simply forget that we have choice in everything we do.
Five Guys, Red Robin, Culvers, and Shake Shack are all significantly better burgers than In N Out – and I do not really even love Shake Shack.
Annual reminder of saying you are humbled when receiving a recognition does not make much sense . . . it has become commonplace, but still does not make sense if you check out the definition. Humbled – to be lowered in importance or significance.
We did this thing with our team last year where we identified our five favorite songs of our five favorite artists – it is an interesting window into those you work with and a great playlist building activity for yourself.
Nuance matters. There are very few things in life that are binary or need dogmatic beliefs. Too many people have made their opinions dogmatic and that is why conversation about anything of substance is so damn hard these days.
Apologies do not cost anything and the best apology is changed behavior.
I still cannot do the craft beer thing and I have no idea why I keep trying. I prefer any Mexican beer (Victoria is outstanding for those looking for something different) or a Keystone, Coors Light, High Life, or Hamms (in that order).
I LOVE when my kids get in trouble and they have no phone. I wonder if they would say the same about me.
Anthony used to tuck his head under my chin to cuddle each morning – seldom happens. Caroline used to ask for a ‘dance party’ every night after dinner – seldom happens. Enjoy those moments – side note, our dog still tucks her head under my chin – so I have that going for me.
Jackson is the best big brother in the world. It is strange how happy that makes you as a parent to watch.
When you send a mass email . . . BCC everyone. That makes it impossible to fall into REPLY ALL hell
Well, that is it .1400+ words on my takeaways during my trip around the sun this year. I will check back in with thoughts like these in about 365 days. As for a birthday gift, it would mean a lot if you sign up for my FREE newsletter here where I share my thoughts on life, leadership, and education just about once a week.